We walk into holidays

As we get ready for the virtual release party* for Cheers and Amen, the book about our adventure of visiting a bar and a church in every state, we're sometimes torn between what we want to do and what we need to do. This past week, for example, we hoped to visit Papa's Place, a new bar in Clovis. 

Finalizing our move to Seattle ended up preventing that visit, so we may never know if Papa's Ramos Fizz is as good as the one we sampled a couple weeks ago at The Majestic Bar at Yosemite.

Still, we can recognize some of the memorable people whose stories didn't fit into the book.  To do that, we're sharing some of our favorite posts here. 

Mickey Quinn's Irish Pub, Seminole, FL

Originally posted 3/19/2016

"A leprechaun," was the answer not once, but twice, when I asked the question, "Who was Saint Patrick?" at Mickey Quinn's Irish Pub. Thursday is usually the day we go to a bar on this trek to visit a bar and a church in every state, and since this past Thursday was Saint Patrick's Day, we came up with the novel idea of going to an Irish themed pub. Apparently several hundred people in the Seminole area came up with the same idea.

Now to be fair, both people who claimed the saint was a leprechaun were obviously joking.  And to be even more (or less) fair, both had already had more than a few drinks. I took a poll of a dozen people or so, and the majority of people I talked to at Mickey Quinn's had no idea who Saint Patrick was; even though Saint Patrick himself (or someone who looked like him; St. Pat has been dead for centuries) made an appearance at the pub that night.

There were some at the pub who did associate Saint Patrick with the church. There was a guy named Brendan who said, "He's a saint, like Saint Brendan, the patron saint of sailors."  And Brendan's friend Nicky knew the legend that Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland (though the fossil record doesn't jibe with that story).

I did find it interesting that there were a number of people who associate Saint Patrick with the church but associate the day with beer and parties. It is very likely that Saint Patrick was familiar with beer, but the real Saint Patrick may have felt out of place at this celebration of his day.

The story goes that Patrick was a fifth century Brit who, as a teenager, was kidnapped by Irish pirates (and really now, why aren't pirates a part of the celebration?) and made a slave in Ireland. Patrick became a Christian as a slave, escaped, and returned to Britain. He became a priest and then, of his own free will, returned to bring the Gospel to Ireland. How this story resulted in a day where the goal for many is to get wasted as quickly as possible is rather baffling.

There were other responses to the importance of the day besides beer. Some people talked about celebrating Irish culture and family. And a man named Billy said the day was about freedom ("It's about when the Irish freed themselves from.... It's about the freedom to express yourself".)

Mickey Quinn's goes to a special effort for the holiday, roping off a large section of the parking lot, bringing in a rented tent, live Irish music, no cover charge, and green beer. Customers come early and are served until 3:00 am.

Most people were wearing green but some people added other costume touches. I talked with young woman named Michelle who was wearing an orange beard. She, like many others, didn't seem to have a clue who Saint Patrick was, but she did have opinions on our standard questions of what makes for a good bar and a good church. She said for both it was important to have people with interesting personalities (but the bar needed good beer as well).

Billy (who associated Saint Patrick's Day with freedom) spoke of the importance of good leadership. He was taking management classes, and believed it was important that managers treated their employees well, in an ethical manner, as they would like to be treated themselves. He attends St. Mary's, a Catholic church.

His friend Greg said he was raised Catholic but now attends a nondenominational church, Pathways, and mentioned that Pastor Bill is awesome.

Brendan and Nicky, who had some of the better answers to the Saint Patrick questions, also had unique answers to the question what makes for a good bar. Brendan said it should be "civilized. That's a good word," while Nicky loved that the bar -- that night, anyway -- had "cute little birdies to watch."

Their friend Denise had an answer for what makes for a good church, "It's where God knows your name."

We met a couple a little older than us, Lou and Linda, who love to travel, so they appreciated our journey and told us about some of their adventures driving through Europe. They associated Saint Patrick with the cathedral named for him. For them, music is important for a good bar; top forty, rock, dance music, Linda said. Lou added (and Linda agreed),"But not rap."

For a church they said it's good to have a priest or pastor that's a good speaker who's down to earth, and it doesn't hurt if he has a good sense of humor.

We must admit that the evening was a bit more challenging for conversation than our usual bar nights, due to the large crowd, loud volume, and more people that were... um... sobriety challenged.

Often we like to talk with a bartender but with the crowd three deep at the inside bar and a line at the outside one - - there was no way that was going to happen. So we stopped to talk with someone in security, Ryan the Bouncer. He's a full time waiter now, but he'd worked as a bouncer for a decade previously. Now he just works as a bouncer for special events (and he assured us he's well paid for his services). I asked for a bouncer story and he told us about the time he had to break up a fight between thirteen people "Someone punched my beautiful face."

We asked what makes for a good bar. He said the atmosphere is important, and that's set by the General Manager. He said the GM there, Ronan , is amazing. "He does literally everything even when it is slow."  He added that everyone should be good at their jobs, knowing what to do and doing it. "This is a nice bar."

In answer to what makes for a good church, Ryan assured us he was the person to ask. He was raised a Catholic back in Michigan, but says that, while it's fine for his parents, it's too old school for him. "I'm about the energy," he said, adding, " I know God's got my back... I can feel the Holy Spirit." He assured us he's not opposed to the Catholic church (his brother is studying to be a priest), but he feels the Catholic church needs to get updated. "It's a new age." He said he has a friend running a church in Michigan. "He's the man. He uses the internet to promote programs and youth events. It's exciting." He also mentioned that God's rescued him "a number of times."

We talked to one more person before we left. Nicky, who we'd talked to earlier, walked past us as we were heading back to our car. He shook our hands again and told us without prelude, "Thailand! That's the place you should go! Thailand! I'm going there next month." Now if we weren't already planning on going to South Carolina, North Carolina, Kentucky and Tennessee, we might have taken him up on that.

(In fairness to the patrons of Mickey Quinn's, I should note that the first ten people I asked at church Wednesday night had no idea who Saint Patrick was either. It was a Baptist church, but still...)

Los Toltecos Mexican Bar and Grill

First posted 5/7/16

We were very excited to go out on the night of Mexican Independence Day. (Wait... Oh, sorry about that. Apparently I got that wrong.) We were very excited to go out on the anniversary of the Mexican Army's victory over the French at the Battle of Puebla on May 5th, because Cinco de Mayo has become a big thing in the States over the years. Television networks have come to expect lower numbers on the holiday, because people do go out drinking.

If Mindy and I are anything, we are conformists, so we looked for a Mexican-themed place to visit in Sterling, Virginia. Many other people felt compelled to do the same. There were no spaces left in Los Toltecos parking lot, so we parked across the street in theSafeway lot. 

When we went inside, all the tables were taken. There was a pretty good throng around the bar. Finding a place to stand where we wouldn't get in the way of the wait staff was tricky.

We overheard one couple as they arrived. The guy said, "Man, this is serious!" And she said, "I told you." We're not sure if they actually went in, because last we saw of them, they were still outside, possibly waiting for friends to swell the throng.

You know those movies where a tremendous crowd drives a couple apart? Los Toltecos was kind of like that, sort of, because I (Dean) ended up going outside to try to talk to people while Mindy stayed at the bar to order drinks.

After awhile, she got close enough to the bar to reach a drinks menu; she looked for the margaritas (because, what with the holiday and all, we had to order margaritas. I guess we could have bought Coronas or Dos Equis, but we really aren't beer fans.) and ordered the Los Toltecas Original with a Jalapeño Margarita for me. Her drink came in a red Solo party cup (the kind you see in every teen comedy party scene since American Pie), and my drink came in a round goblet that seemed to weigh as much as a small bowling ball.

While she was waiting for the bartender to mix our drinks, Mindy talked to the two guys who let her get close enough to the bar to order. She asked them our weekly questions ("What makes for a good bar?" and "What makes for a good church?"). Joseph said he values a patio because sitting outside and drinking is one of his favorite things.

Sadly, rain that evening was keeping everyone inside and adding to the claustrophobic (though lively) ambiance. Joseph's friend Connor agreed that a patio was good, but he felt something else was more important: "I would say good service, but you expect that anywhere. So, I'll say a kind staff." He said that kindness went beyond competent work to respect for the people being served.

As to what makes a good church, Joseph said there should be passion for individual members of the church from everyone, not just leadership. That's the quality that drew him to the church he attended in his teen years.  

Connor said that during his elementary years, he had attended a church and a private school that had provided him and his sister (who had attended through high school) valuable counsel for career goals and life beyond high school.

Meanwhile, I was in front of Los Toltecos, hoping to talk to the exiled smokers outside, where there were more reasonable sound levels. I chatted with Timur, who I think, based on his accent, was from Eastern Europe. I asked what made for a good bar, and he said, "I am debating the number one thing for a good bar between the surroundings and the people, but I guess the people are part of the surroundings so that would make it number one."

When I asked what made for a good church, he gave me a bit of his background. His mother is Muslim and his father is Christian, and he feels it is important to learn about all religions so that one can make a sober judgment about faith. He said it's important that a church is welcoming. But if they are judging you, thinking you will go to hell if you don't join them, then they're not welcoming. He compared judgmental people to a saying of his boyhood, "A drowning animal barks loudest as it is about to go down."

A friend of Timur's, Marjorie, came outside and graciously agreed to answer my questions. She said a "Spanish bar" is quite different from an American bar because it "gets crazy." She said that she could "go to an American bar with my girls, have a drink and go home, that's it." At an American bar you can smile at a guy, and it's just considered a friendly gesture, but at a Mexican bar the guy will assume there's more to it and may well hassle the woman who smiled. At an American bar there is respect.

She said she was at Los Toltecos with friends; her sister is the designated driver. She said her husband was not much of a drinker, so he was waiting at home, as were her parents. She went on to tell me that she came to this country when she was sixteen, and that she loves America. "It is the best country. You need to work hard, but there is a time for fun, if you're responsible. If you don't go crazy, you'll be happy."

She told me that one of the things that she appreciated most about this country is that it allowed her mother to have the heart transplant that saved her life. Her mother went to the top of the list because she was a Christian woman. The hospital didn't consider her religion, of course, but they did take into consideration that she had never smoked and didn't drink.  They considered her a perfect candidate. Her family had been quite worried as the heart was flown into the Fairfax hospital during a snowstorm that could have proved a deadly delay, but the heart arrived in time. After only two weeks on the waiting list, the operation took place. Marjorie said her mother had gone from 94 pounds to 140 (a more healthy weight for her), and you could never tell by looking at her that she had a heart transplant.

When I asked what made for a made for a good church, Marjorie said, "I like Christian, not Catholic. I believe in one God." It was quite obvious she was thinking of her mother's church.

On a crowded bar night, it is ironically more difficult to find people to talk to (we certainly weren't able to talk to a bartender or even any of the staff). But we're glad that, at Los Toltecos, we found the really delightful people we did.

*Want to hang out with fun people and learn more about our travels? Come to The Final Edition in Santa Rosa Sunday night at 5 or Duke's Spirited Cocktails in Healdsburg on Monday at 7! 

We walk into a bar with a squirrel

The Majestic Bar, Yosemite National Park, California
He kept trying to sneak into the bar, and not once did the bar staff ask for his I.D. I expect they didn’t ask because this was not a human trying to sneak a drink. It was a squirrel. The door to the patio was propped open so the wait staff could easily take food and drinks to the patio tables. I guess wildlife visits are among the many perks of barlife at The Majestic Bar in Yosemite National Park.

For those keeping track, this is our second hotel bar in a row, and as we mentioned last week, hotel bars are a little different than most bars -- especially neighborhood bars. Hotel bars don’t tend to have regulars, but they do tend to have a variety of patrons coming in and out.

Kyle the bartender told us that The Majestic does have regulars, but they visit the bar annually, not weekly (until a few years ago, those regulars went to the Ahwahnee Hotel Bar, but the hotel’s name changed when the concession management changed. The old concessionaire took the storied name with them when they left). But Kyle only knows this from stories he’s heard. He’s only been bartending at the Majestic Bar since January of this year. In fact, he’s only been bartending at all since January (though we’d never have guessed it. He was impressive). Kyle has worked other jobs in the park, at the hotel front desk, as a restaurant host, selling tickets… but now he’s at the bar.

We’ve been living in Fresno, but we’ll be moving to the Seattle area in a few weeks, so we wanted to make one last visit to the national park before we leave. In order to beat the traffic and to get to a couple of worship services in the park (Protestant at Yosemite Valley Chapel and Catholic in the Visitor Center Theater), we left home early. After finding a surprisingly central parking spot (a treasure on a busy summer day), we decided to walk to The Majestic Yosemite Hotel for our picnic lunch.

After eating at a bench over a creek, we went into the hotel and took seats at the bar. There were plenty of seats at the bar, and we heard staff remarking that it was a rather slow day, surprising for a weekend afternoon. There was theorizing about whether it was because it was a Sunday afternoon and people left the park early to get home, or whether people weren’t coming because it was because it was Father’s Day. To our eyes, there were still lots of people in the Valley.

We looked over our menus, which had its share of Yosemite themed cocktails (such as the El Capitini, which we heard described as the “Jolly Rancher of cocktails” because of its sweetness). I went with the Bourbon Baked Apple and Mindy got all fancy with a variation on the Keoki coffee. As a treat for me (Father’s Day has its privileges), I ordered a chocolate chip cookie from the dessert menu.

We once asked an accountant who worked for a bar what features can make a bar more profitable, and he said it always helps to have an inviting patio area. It is hard to imagine a more inviting patio area than one that looks out on the trees and mountains and grandeur of Yosemite National Park. Many people were outside at the tables on the patio enjoying a pleasantly warm day.

A woman who came to the bar to get her drink asked Kyle, “Can I take my drink outside?”

He told her, “You can take it anywhere, even outside. Just don’t leave your glass outside.”

We heard Kyle ask for eggs from the kitchen when he had an order for a couple of Ramos Fizzes. After he’d made up the very pretty drinks, he sent them out, and the waitress came back right away with an order for more. “I made that drink too good! Other people are ordering it,” he said. He let us try a sample, and it was delicious.

Many people ordered drinks at the bar, but they didn’t stay there to enjoy them, so we knew if we were going to ask our standard bar questions, we’d have to ask the staff. So we asked Kyle, “What makes for a good bar?” and for the first time in a long time, we got a completely new answer: “Not having a slope at the edge of the bar.”

The wooden bar at the Majestic is elegant, but the stylish slant on the customer’s side is somewhat hazardous to beverages. The staff warns everyone, but a drink goes down at least once a week.

We can certainly endorse the rest of Kyle’s answer, which we’ve heard more often. “Good people, good workers, makes the day go by.” Kyle was busy doing his job for a while before he could tell us what he thought made a good church. He answered, “Same thing, the people.”

We also asked Rachelle, one of the servers, our questions. She said she likes a divey bar, so atmosphere matters. “The locals make for a good bar. They’re chatty, you find out everything that’s going on.” Her father goes to a bar in Wallace, Idaho, a mining town. Everyone gets a free drink after a shift. Some stop at one drink, but enough go on to make the free drink worthwhile for the bar’s bottom line. It’s one of her favorite bars in the world.

As for what makes for a good church, Rachelle said, “It’s been a long time since I’ve gone,” but after some thought she added, “A place that’s accepting and loving and gives back to the community.” She said, “But that’s hard to find.” And Kyle agreed.

Of course, we’ve found churches like that. As we’ve found bars like that. We have a little more church and bar experience than most people, and we wrote a book about it. But if you should have to choose between buying our book and going to Yosemite National Park, I’d recommend Yosemite.

We (finally) walk into a hotel bar

Atrium Lounge, DoubleTree by Hilton, Fresno, California
Drinks to go are usually not a bar thing. It’s pretty common to see signs near the door that say, “No Alcohol Beyond This Point.” At this bar, though, those signs are missing, and people taking drinks to their rooms is an everyday event. That’s one of the many things that make a hotel bar different than other bars.

I’ve wanted to write about this particular bar since September, but I couldn’t write about the Atrium Lounge while I was an employee of the DoubleTree by Hilton Hotel where the bar resides. As an employee, I wasn’t supposed to frequent the bar (certainly a very sensible rule), and I worked night audit, starting just as the bartenders were finishing up. Because it’s in the lobby, surrounded by guest rooms, the bar can’t stay open too late; there’s always a balance between guests celebrating cheerily (and, often, noisily) with libations and guests trying to get a good night’s sleep. But since I no longer work there, visiting the bar is acceptable.

The bar is usually populated by business people relaxing after a long day of work or travel. Sometimes it’s a visiting baseball team celebrating a win over the Fresno Grizzlies, or concert goers enjoying a nightcap after a show at the convention center next door. When a religious group is hosting a retreat at the hotel, often the bar’s business goes down (though they make it up a bit with drinks ordered through room service).

On occasion while I was working at the hotel desk, I’d get complaints from the rooms about loud folks at the bar. Usually in a bar you don’t need to hush people, but this is a different kind of place. Another thing that makes it different is the waterfall. Most bars don’t have three-story indoor waterfalls.

We went on a Tuesday night, and the bar was full, so we sat at one of the tables. I knew the bar staff: Brandon was tending bar and Kasandra was waiting tables. In the past, we’d often chatted as their shifts ended and mine began.

Mindy and I were ready to order more generic drinks, but after we took a look at the menu, I ordered a “Big Black Cow… And Get Out of Here” (just because of the name) and Mindy ordered a “Blossom Trail Martini.”

Though they were busy, but Kasandra and Brandon took time to answer the two questions we always ask at bars, “What makes for a good bar?” and “Whether you go or not, what would make for a good church?”

After serving us our drinks, Kasandra said, “I think you need an attentive staff. People who can talk about anything.” Servers in a bar may need to discuss a wide range of topics, from what there is to do in town to the game playing on the TV. (By the way, sadly, the Oakland A’s were not playing well on the TV). She added that a bar should be, “Clean with good stock, an assortment for everybody.”

I asked her what she liked about working in this bar in particular. She’s worked in other hospitality locations and at a casino, but she said she loves it at the DoubleTree because of the people. She also appreciates that it is an open space. “The front desk is right there, and there are cameras.” It does make for a secure working environment. She also appreciates the variety of guests, “there are business people, sports people, families. There's more in the world than your hometown.”

As for what makes for a good church, she said, “Acceptance. You want to walk in and be with other people on their spiritual journeys, not judging or shaming. And love that isn’t just a front, but you can feel it.”

As we finished our drinks, we noticed there were a couple of seats open at the bar, so we went up to chat with Brandon. According to him, a good bar has “A couple of things. I’m not sure what the word is… It’s not entertainment, but it’s where you can find a good conversation.” He’s worked in holes-in-the-wall, nice restaurants, nightclubs (you don’t find those good conversations in nightclubs, he pointed out). He said the word he wanted meant something about individuals in the same place looking to talk together.

He explained that a hotel bar is different from a neighborhood bar. In a hotel bar, the travelers are often business people who, if they want to have a conversation, have to be willing to talk to strangers. “At this bar, there are people from all over the country, from all over the world.”

Neighborhood bars, he said, draw people from different walks of life, but they know each other. You might have people who don’t drink anymore, but still come and have their O’Douls or a soda.

It took time to get Brandon to answer the second question, primarily because he was busy. I asked for one word for what made for a good church. He said “acceptance.” (I’m pretty sure he didn’t overhear Kasandra.) He said these days you have to understand other people’s beliefs, but everyone shares the same core values, they’re just expressed differently.

We’re planning to move out of the Fresno area in the next few weeks, but it was nice to be able to visit my old workplace as a guest -- even though it was a little annoying that they seem to be doing just fine without me.

We go to a couple of one-horned bars

Unicorn/Narwhal, Seattle, Washington
Since I’m writing this week, rather than Mindy, I can brag for her. She scored a 100 points on one throw in Skee-Ball a discussion of Skee-Ball ethics. Our daughter, Jil, told us about a couple who played Skee-Ball (which I think we can all agree is a very fine date activity) when the guy went forward and dropped the ball into the big points hole. Obviously, this offended his date, who reminded him of proper Skee-Ball behaviour, probably ending the relationship...but these are serious matters.

A bar with Skee-Ball, pinball, and video games already has a lot of points on the plus side for us. Unicorn (upstairs) and Narwhal (downstairs) is such a bar. Not only do they have the games in Narwhal, but they carry a carnival theme throughout the space and on the menu as well. Even the water dispenser seems to be from the midway, with colored lights building and fading.

The clown decorations, which work for the carnival theme, but would (of course) also work for a house of horrors. I kind of doubt anybody would trust the drinks in a house of horrors, though. They might have arsenic or hemlock among the ingredients, while the drinks at Unicorn included bubblegum, watermelon, and cotton candy flavors.

I ordered a drink that admittedly sounds like an option in a house of horrors: Cereal Killer. The ingredients weren’t so deadly, though: RumChata, Sprite, Grenadine, and Froot Loop vodka. sounds, admittedly, like an options at a Horror Bar, The Cereal Killer. But the ingredients were not deadlyish: RumChata Liqueur, Sprite, Soda, Grenadine, and Fruit Loop Vodka. (I’m guessing they didn’t use the Kellogg’s preferred spelling of “Froot Loops” to avoid lawsuits -- or to suggest the drink contains something healthy).

Taxidermied heads fill several walls (maybe more of a horror theme there, too?). Though we saw zebra, water buffalo, and warthogs on the wall, as far as we could tell, no actual unicorns were killed in order to decorate the bars. We saw a goaticorn head on one wall, but I don’t think they’re endangered. Or real.

The food menu includes fries and tots, burgers and corn dogs, funnel cakes and deep fried Snickers. Jil had the vegan quinoa tots, while the rest of us had corndog variants (my Magi-corn dog was topped with barbecue sauce, slaw, and onion rings).

Unicorn was busy, but it was a little slower in Narwhal, so we had a chance to talk with Zach, the downstairs bartender. I asked him our standard questions. He said a good bar had a variety of people, and “tons of overlap.” He said it was “important that there’s something for everyone. Cheap beer can be enjoyed by rich people. Of course, poor people can’t go the other way” to buy the expensive cocktails or liquors. We asked what he appreciated about this bar in particular, and he said, “Honestly, I appreciate that they gave me a job when I came here from Arkansas.” He said the owners are very nice.

As for a what makes for a good church, Zach said, “I’m not a believer, you know, but there should be an active promotion of love and peace.”

We went to Unicorn because it sounded like a fun place to be with our son and younger daughter while we visited Seattle in preparation for our move to the area. We each found something we liked on the menu (which can be a challenge for our family), the drinks were unusual, so I could write about that, and there were the games. A good time had by all.